Summary of the article:
- Why doesn’t my husband want to move?
- The right persuasion tactics
- Prohibited methods of persuasion
- Special emphasis on the child’s happiness
- Situations where you should agree with your husband
Moving with your spouse can turn into an unpredictable journey. People often dream of moving to another city where there are more attractive opportunities with jobs, better ecology and better conditions for the study and development of the child. Unfortunately, the husband does not always share the wife’s dream. What arguments will help convince your husband to move to another city? He, as well, has his own fair arguments in favor of not moving anywhere. In this case, the wife will have to be patient and explain that the move will open up many opportunities for their future happy life.
Why doesn’t my husband want to move?
Some women make a huge mistake by paying attention only to their desire to move to another city. At the same time, they forget that the man still will not agree to the move, as long as something confuses him in this serious step. Therefore, first of all, you need to find out what exactly is bothering him.
Leading reasons why a man doesn’t want to move:
- Fear of not finding a job in a new city. Perhaps one of the most common fears. It is quite reasonable, because usually a man has a duty to take care of his family. If he does not find a job in another city, or if the employer offers much less in a new place, then the man will experience psychological discomfort.
- Unwillingness to change the usual environment. Striving for consistency is not a bad trait. A man just got used to a cozy house or apartment in which he lived many years, to old friends, the view from the window, etc. Such people take any change of situation painfully.
- The need to spend a lot on moving and buying a home. If the family has poor savings, then the man is quite rightly afraid of change. You may also read some useful tips on how to avoid hidden costs of moving to have a clear idea where to save.
- Stubbornness and the desire to appear to be the main thing in the family. The man thinks like this: “The idea to move came from my wife. It turns out that I follow her lead and fulfill her whim.” Of course, the spouse will not exactly voice this reason. But it certainly does if he can’t explain his reluctance to move.
The right persuasion tactics when moving
After carefully listening to the arguments of the spouse, we build our persuasion tactics. There is a universal plan that helps in most cases:
- Promise to understand that your husband will need time to find a job. If there is a chance that the salary will be less at the new job, then also assure him of his readiness to calmly accept this fact. But you will have to keep your promise and not even hint to your husband that he should look for a more “decent” position. Reproaches will not only cause discord in the family, but also allow your husband to justly accuse you of not being able to keep your word.
- Talk about the advantages of a new place of residence. This can be anything: better medical care, career opportunities, etc.; Consider options to improve the financial situation of the family after the move. If your husband is worried that all the savings will have to be invested in housing and moving, then promise to spend the family budget more economically. For example, express your willingness to give up the usual joys: going to a beauty salon, buying expensive cosmetics, etc. You can sacrifice something more weighty. For example, to abandon a planned vacation abroad or buy a new fur coat.
- Make it clear that you rely on your husband when choosing a new house or apartment. Of course, this is justified if your goal is only to move to another city, and the specific place of residence in it does not play a special role. Let your spouse feel that you are not trying to control him and impose his desires. This is possible if he makes some of the important decisions himself.
Prohibited methods of persuasion
A reasonable spouse should avoid the following methods of persuading her husband:
- Blame the unwillingness to improve the situation of family members. Don’t say something like, “Because of your stubbornness, the child and I will have to live in this miserable little town for the rest of our lives!»;
- Hint at a breakup. For example, few people will like the phrase: “Why should I even live with someone who has no desire to strive for something in this life?»;
- Devalue the efforts of a loved one. For any man, it will be a shame to hear a reproach: “Of course, if you stay in this position, then we will definitely not save up for suitable housing.”
Special emphasis on the child’s happiness
Any normal parent wants their child to be happy and achieve a lot in life. If moving to another city really contributes to this, then the wife should point it out. Read also Stress-killer Tips When Moving.
Again, you should avoid reproaches and hints about the unwillingness of the husband to think about the happiness of the child. In a family conversation, the focus is on rational assumptions about how exactly moving will improve the life of a son or daughter:
- A visit to a more prestigious school, and in the future the opportunity to enter a university;
- The presence of many children’s sections and clubs in the new city;
- Stay in an eco-friendly city, away from factories.
Situations where you should agree with your husband
In some cases, moving may create more problems for the family. So, the spouse should refuse to move in the following cases:
- The family is going to be replenished. When moving, you will have to be a lot nervous, which is definitely harmful for a pregnant woman;
- Serious financial problems and debt. You may also consider taking a loan for moving;
- The spouse’s profession will definitely not be in demand in another city. For example, he works as an aquarist. If there are no aquariums in neighboring cities, then it is unlikely that the husband should sacrifice his favorite profession and go to security guards or become an office employee.
When convincing your spouse to move to another city, you should avoid reproaches and accusations. First, you should find out what exactly is stopping him from changing his place of residence, and then choose suitable arguments that will calm him down and make him think. Consider hiring a professional mover to save your family time. Planning your moving budget in advance will help you to save some money and also control everything. Use our moving cost calculator and read all the additional information here. We also offer a moving checklist that you may download. Check our fresh moving news at our blog and watch our YouTube Moving Tips.